Icicles
by chino5294
Summary: "He is always there, against my wishes. And although I would rather die than say this to his face, I could always depend on him to be there when I need it most. From time to time, he is there for me, whether as a friend or even more so as a..." This Story is IchiHitsu (Ichigo Kurosaki x Toshiro Hitsugaya) It is YAOI don't like, don't read.
1. Frozen Pond

**This is After the Diamond Dust Rebellion.**

The ground was covered in a blanket of crisp, bitter snow. But I don't mind, the cold is like home. I walked to the pond, while the ankle high snow crumpled under my feet. The tree tops looked like they were covered in powdered sugar.

The path was hidden in a dune of snow, like all the surrounding area was. But I have wandered this passage so often. I followed my memory. I ducked under the thorny branches. My mind alerted me every time there was a turn or bump coming up, having burned this passage into my memory. I observed the evergreens, sprinkled with snow. It seemed like a never ending pathway of snow and ice, but, like everything, it gave way to something amazing. A beautiful scenery of frozen lower ground, a pond that had frozen over. Icicles decorated the nature surrounding it. I sighed, this place had always comforted me. Everything was peaceful, silent, like it always was. The wind carried snow from one dwelling to another. I cherish the tranquility and the undisturbed atmosphere of this place.

Crunch, snap.

_**Was it an animal that doesn't hibernate?No, I concluded,no beauty of nature would ever threaten the silence this bad. **_

Footfalls echoed from the one has ever found this area before. No doubt people would destroy this place, my home. _**I cannot let that happen. This is the only spot in the world I truly feel at ease. **_They kept advancing, and then it just stopped. I slowly turned my head to survey the area, knowing that if it is wildlife, sudden movements would startle the creature. Nothing is here. But I defiantly heard- then the sun-light died. Either someone was behind me, or a large tree or cloud was blocking the moon. I moved my hands to my eyes. Hands. More specifically human hands. I then searched my side, preparing to swipe at them with my zanpakuto. I slide the blade out slowly, making the most minute a sound as possible. I breathed in shallow breaths. Then when my zanpakuto was in position, I lashed out at the man.

"Don't be so serious! I'm just kidding!" I heard a strangely familiar voice yell.

"Then back down." I said through gritted teeth.

"Why are you always so uptight?" He asked stepping away.

He had carrot colored hair, and along with the outfit and sword, he had to be identified as Ichigo Kurosaki.

I stared at him for a minute, trying to create a comeback.

"What are you doing here, substitute soul reaper?" I asked.

"Hey, lay off," he said staring at me with his brown eyes, "I have every right to be here."

_**He is right.**_

"Fine," I said, quietly walking off.

He was about to grab my arm.I positoned my zanpakuto at him.

"Do not touch me," I said, glaring at him.

He gave a confused face.

"How come? Why do you hate affection so much?" He asked.

"Do not waste your 'kind gestures' on me. For your sake and mine." I said, turning away to leave.

I saw Ichigo frown right before I turned._** Knowing him, he'll follow he. **_But I continued to lead him to the house. _**Arguing and fighting is too strenuous right now; I came here to relieve my stress, not make more!**_ He stayed a few steps behind, knowing that I would hurt him if he tried to touch me.

After a while of snowy, windy paths, we came into the view of my house. _**Finally, time away from Ichigo! **_I ran to my house. I squeezed through the door whilst shutting it behind me. Ichigo struggled with the door, with me still holding on to it. It is a game of tug-o-war.

"Go away, Ichigo!" I yelled, reaching for the lock.

But I am not as strong as Ichigo. He grasped the knob and yanked the door open, throwing me of balance. I fell forward, landing on Ichigo's chest.

"Sorry to be barging in, but I wasn't finished talking to you," Ichigo said.

I pretended to chuckle, "I've never seen you be so serious before, Ichigo. 'Don't be so serious'." _**Maybe I could anger him, so he'll leave. Then, I can finally have peace.**_

" You know I won't leave unless I talk to you," he said.

I sighed, "Fine," I said, letting him in.

I lead him into the sitting room.

"Wait here, I'm going to, make some tea," I said blankly, leaving the room.

ICHIGO POV

"Wait here, I'm going to, make some tea," he said blankly, leaving the room.

_**Why is he always so formal? **_I chuckled. I heard some jousting around in the kitchen._** That's a good sign, I think. **_Then everything was dead silent. _**And I guess that's the bad sign. **_I walked into the kitchen, and just like I predicted, it was empty. I walked to the closest room. It appeared to be his room. _**Well, just this once. He won't tell me anything anyways**_, I though pulling back the covers.

"What the hell?!" I yelled looking at the site.

There was a pool of dried blood, soaked in the middle of the mattress.


	2. Valley of Ice

**Thanks for waiting, guys! Just know that the more positive feedback I get, the quicker I update. As promised, this is the second chapter of Icicles! I think this chapter is a lot better than the last one...so enjoy! PLEASE REVIEW! Or better yet, Private Message me! It really motivates me, and I need a lot of that these days. Enjoy!**

**Here comes the usual rant. I do not own Bleach. But I do own three slightly stupid, but adorable cats.**

**This chapter is dedicated to AngryHitsu, for giving me motivation. Thanks, and enjoy the fic!**

TOSHIRO POV

I escaped through the kitchen window. _**I can't go back to the pond, but what about...yah... that'll work. **_I started sprinting towards where the high field was. I ran down the dirt road until I no longer could. _**Time to start bush-whacking. **_I pushed down branch after branch and stepped on not only fallen limbs of trees but also small shrubs I couldn't even name. Then, after a long time of walking through part of a forest, I finally eyed the snowy paradise. _**In the summer, bright, colorful cypripedium use to grow in the luscious, soft, high grass. Then there was a cherry blossom field next to it. **_Snow clung to the now dead, but still standing, grass. The cherry blossom tree's limbs were bare and coated delicately with snow. The dead, but also still standing, flower stalks were light frosted. I sighed and sat down in the grass. _**This is just as peaceful as the pond, **_I thought, closing my eyes meditating.

ICHIGO POV

** Was he injured? What a stupid question, of course! The blood obviously was from today. Where are you Toshiro? And why run? First, let's find you. **I walked into the kitchen. **Locate all the exists...The window! ** I pulled up the pane, surprised that it was wide open. **He did use this window after all...** I flew out into the daylight, as I set off to find Toshiro.

TOSHIRO POV

**Peace, silence. The perfect stress reliever. **I felt the wind play with my hair, placing snowflakes in it. I knew from experience that snow made my hair sparkle in the sunlight. **I bet it's sparkling now, with the sun like this. **The memories played around in my head.

***FLASHBACK [which is in Diamond Dust Rebellion] ***

"I'm the true master of Hyourinmaru!" He had said.

Then, my best and only friend was skewered with 5-6 blades from several stealth force members.

*** End Of Flashback! ***

I grimaced, I didn't have the power to stop that. And I would never forget that moment. **They killed him because of me. All because we had the same zanpakuto. Which upset balance. What would have happened if it hadn't ended that tragic? **I felt a tear escape my expressionless face. I always missed him. No matter how mean he was at times. **Why of all people, did it have to be him to come back? Just as soon as I was getting better... But he came back, and I had to kill him. With my own hands.**

"Toshiro," I heard a voice behind me mutter.

**Ichigo, **I thought standing up, and wiping my face free from tears. **Even if I wanted help, I can't accept it. I'm a captain of one of the thirteen court guard squads, I have to be toug- **but I was cut off by the feeling of falling. A twig had tripped me. **My luck...** I felt Ichigo's warm arm wrap around my waist, helping me back to my feet.

Time seemed to slow. My eyes had widened with surprise. And not long after, rage soon followed. **I don't need Kurosaki's help, I am a captain of one of the thirteen court guard squads, so I need to act like it. **I fixed my footage, and I shoved Kurosaki nearly to the ground.

"Don't try to help me Kurosaki," I said with venom as I drew my sword and put it to his neck, "I've made it this far without any. So if you try to help, I will do what I must."

His eyes narrowed. I flicked my sword away, and slid Hyourinmaru back into its sheath. I put back on my blank face, then turned around and walked off. I heard rustling of Ichigo getting up off the grass. But then, an ominous silence fell across the valley, with the exception of grass shifting. I turned around to see Kurosaki starring with disbelief at the area behind me.

"You still haven't changed. It's comforting to know that I affected you that much. I would hate for things to change before I got back." The person spoke.

**That monotone, but it can't be, **I thought, turning around. But the person in front of me was proof enough to turn my fear into reality.

"Ku-Kusaka?" I stuttered with fear.

Sojiro Kusaka, the man from my past. Our meeting was as sudden as our passing.

***FLASHBACK***

"You must be Toshiro Hitsugaya, the boy genius that everyone's been talking about!"

"Who are you?" I had replied.

***DIFFERENT FLASHBACK***

"I plan to become a soul reaper, and devote my life to the soul society!"

"Oh yeah?" I replied, "Well you know I was thinking-"

"Wow! Look at that score! You really are a genius!" he chirped.

"I don't know about that..." I mumbled.

"Still I'm not going to let you beat me next time!"

***DIFFERENT FLASHBACK***

"Toshiro, you and I, we're friends right?"

***END OF FLASHBACK***

I shuddered as the horrid memory played through my mind. _**I can't fight, kill him again**_**, **I thought as I grimaced, _**and how cold-hearted can I be? Do I literally have a heart of ice?**_I flickered back to the present. I looked into those dark eyes of his. His evil smile and narrow, purpose filled eyes. My eyes narrowed, _**he really does mean me harm after all. He's evil. **_One part of my mind argued, _**He's Kusaka! Haven't I put him through enough? **_The war in my head ragged on, driving me to the ground. I grasped my temples with one hand, hoping to wait out the pain. The two Shinigami were arguing, but pain flooded my ears and blurred my mind. The pain was overwhelming: the guilt, the grief, the hurt.

"Toshiro!" I finally heard Ichigo call.

His warm hands closed around my sides as he knelt behind me. He held me like that for a while. I chose to just let it be, _**Why waste the energy?**_ I thought. I heard muffled conversation. Kurosaki put his arms at the crease of my knee, and the other behind my back. He lifted me with ease into the air, as he got to his feet. He held me close as he walked off. I loosened my eyes. He was exceptionally warm, and I could hear his steady heartbeat. I smiled, until I remembered he was carrying me. I nudged his arm, signaling to put me down.

"Nah," he said, "I want to carry you."

He kept on walking. Evergreen and Cedar trees passed by, side by side.

"Where are we going?" I murmured bluntly.

He thought for a while, then said, " My house."

"Why your house, Kurosaki?"

"Because I want to have a nice talk without you running away."

"You don't trust me?" I said, eyes narrowed in their usual fashion.

I looked around as far as my head would allow me. We were indeed trekking in the direction of Kurosaki's home. I did not fight him, which was odd enough, but I did cross my arms.

"I can walk," I said, cutting the silence short.

He thought for a while, "After what happened to you," he finally replied, "I don't know, because I can and want to?"

"That sounded like more of a question than an answer," I whispered, "And only because I let you."

He chuckled, "You couldn't do anything about it, Toshiro."

I clenched my teeth, but it was true. My mission was to guard Karakura, and Yamamoto wouldn't be happy if I hurt Kurosaki. _**If I don't hurt him too much, he can always heal…. **_I reached my hand to the spot it usually laid, but I only felt thin air. _**Hyourinmaru? Where is he? Did I leave him in the valley? **_I frantically pushed myself out of his arms and landed gracefully on my feet. The sash fell loosely around me. I started up the road, until I heard it. The sound of a sword being unsheathed. I turned my head to face the person. Kurosaki held a thin zanpakuto out of its sheath. _**Zangetsu isn't that small, and this zanpakuto isn't the color of his banki, but then who's is- **_My train of thought stopped, as so did my movement. I clenched my teeth. Hyourinmaru. He had Hyourinmaru. I slowly turned around, giving off a harsh growl.

"Kurosaki," I said while giving him a death glare, "Hand it over."

He gave that classic grin of his, "Where's the fun in that? Plus, how can I trust you won't try to hurt someone? I you want it, you'll have to come take it from me."

I tightened my fists and relaxed my jaw. _**Is he really challenging me?**_ I looked straight into the substitutes' eyes. Determination. _**He obviously, like a fool, won't back down. But then again, I don't have Hyourinmaru… and he has Zangetsu….**_

"Don't worry," he said, reading the tinge of worry that came over my face, "I won't use Zangetsu, that wouldn't be fair, would it?"

I smiled, "What about kido? I don't think you want to face against me in kido."

His eyes narrowed as he thought for a moment, then he smiled, "I forgot all about kido, but I guess it would make things fair…"

"Fair how?"

"Just believe me, and I have been working on my kido! I can't be as bad as you think!"

The breeze shifted, scattering leaves on the forest floor. Eyes focused, hands still, I stared into Kurosaki's eyes. _**He's focused, but happy… **_My eyes narrowed as the first move was made.

*I hope you all enjoyed this chapter, I put a lot of work into it. Feel free to review and please feel free to PM me, it is really encouraging, please contact me if you want me to continue, give advice, or if you just want to talk! Do not freak out if the third chapter takes a while, it will be typed, if someone tells me to continue. Thanks for your time!

~ Jay


	3. Thawing Heart

**Disclaimer- I do not own Bleach or it's characters. ALSO this is yaoi, do not like, do not read. Now onto the story!**

Ichigo suddenly threw a punch. My eyes widened with surprise as I leaped back, but immediately narrowed with concentration. We then started sparring.

Punches went flying, of which I dodged countless times. It was becoming quite frustrating, I would him a blow for his rib cage only to be disappointed whenever he scurried away just in time. _If I keep this up I have I have a fair shot at winning,though which my opponent being Ichigo, one shot and it will be over. So basically in this situation, the best course of action would be to get the most, accurate, hits possible._ He threw a right, hooked shot, aiming for my gut. Ichigo smiled as he threw the arm forward as I raised my arm to block. This solid punch sent reverberations throughout my arm making it shake with the force. _How many fights has he gone through? He just threw punch after punch on instinct, probably without even thinking._ I blocked another blow and smiled, a new course of action in mind. He rushed forward preparing a powerful punch. I smiled mischievously aware of the plan I wasn't going to fail. Just as he let the punch fly, time seemed to slow. I threw my head to the side which was followed by my back and feet, which joined my head, stepping also to the side. But I left my right foot in place, in front of him, which caused him to immediately pitch forward. He landed in a jumbled mess upon the grass and dirt. My smile opened a few notches more with the realization that my plan had worked.

His face shot up out of the soil with an angry look, "Hey! What's the big idea of you tripping me like that?" he demanded.

I kept grinning, "You should pay more attention to what you are doing, Kurosaki!" I taunted.

He smiled in response.

" You have dirt in your teeth," I commented mockingly.

"Well, Toshiro, I have never seen you smile before."

The smile immediately fell off my lips.

Ichigo suddenly got a hurt look in his chocolate eyes, "It was cute."

_No, no, no, no, _I thought as a warm blush over my face.

Ichigo then proceeded to put on his classic grin, "Let's go to my house. Here," he said tossing Hyourinmaru to me, which I gracefully caught.

I shoved back on my usual face, "Fine, Kurosaki."

~~~~~~~~~At the Kurosaki Residence~~~~~~~~~

"Ichigo! Welcome, you are finally home!" Yuzu greeted happily.

"Yo," Ichigo responded casually.

Karin slid out from behind the wall, "Hey, you brought Toshiro with you."

_Captain Hitsugaya._ I thought loudly, but luckily, my mouth stayed shut.

"We can talk later, Yuzu, but now me and Toshi-"

"Captain Hitsugaya!" I interrupted.

" Captain Hitsugaya," Ichigo restarted, "Need to talk for few."

Yuzu sighed, "Okay, but you are going to talk later."

Ichigo chuckled, "Of course, Yuzu," he then turned to me, " Come on, Toshir-"

"Captain Hitsugaya," I stated through gritted teeth.

Ichigo, who was now irritated, began again, "Captain."

He began walking up the staircase. I then crossed my arms as I fold the carrot-head. Once we got into his room, he immediately plopped down on his bed. He then proceeded to lay on his back and stretch. He laid there as I fumed, staring at him. He turned his head and looked up at me. He smiled as he scooted over. Disappointed, he then sat up and rolled his shoulders, his gaze relaxed as he patted an area on his bed next to him. My eyes narrowed, finally understanding what he was trying to make me do. _He wanted me to sit next to him, on his bed of all things._

"I would prefer chairs if you don't mind."

"Well," Ichigo shrugged, "I'm comfy, sit down."

" No. I would rather stand," I replied defensively.

"Whatever, your choice," he said standing up.

He walked over to me and put an arm around my waist.

"Hey!" I exclaimed, struggling in his grip.

But it was futile, Ichigo was no weakling. He picked me up by the waist and chucked me onto the mattress. I then landed on my back, and proceeded to slowly lift my head to look up at him. Ichigo immediately came over to the bed and laid on top of me.

"What the heck?" I interrogated.

"This is so you can't run away again. Now answer the question, what's wrong?" he asked looking at my face, more specifically, into my eyes.

_What's wrong with me? We realize Kusaka is indeed still alive, what is okay in this situation? Also, I can't help but feel alone, Kusaka was my only friend._

"What do you mean Kurosaki?" I managed to mutter, the pain was overwhelming.

"Can we please just sit?" I ask.

"Fine," he replied with his casual tone.

Gripped my abdomen, sitting into the upright position. I felt myself cringe at the pain that flew through me. _It has only seemed to get worse._ I felt the area that the pain waves originated from. The memory of it played through my mind. _I had finally seen Kusaka again, he had given me this wound, to serve as a reminder of his ability. _ My face turned grave._Me and Kusaka had acquired the same zanpakuto_.

"Hey, are you okay?" Ichigo asked, trying to hide the worry that had covered his face.

I faked a smile. _The 4th division had been so busy at the tome healing the wounds of others that I had caused. I hadn't had the confidence to ask them to heal me as well. _I felt the warm, crimson liquid lick at my fingers from where the wound lie. _I doubt that I could hide this fourth longer. It will eventually show unless I do something, I would hate for someone to be worried for me._ My eyes scanned the room for answers, narrowing on it's target. _I cannot jostle the wound any further, and it'll be a miracle if I can slip this past him._

He gave me a quizzing face, "You didn't answer my question, Toshiro."

"I am all right," I said calmly, but then layered my voice with venom, "And it is Captain Hitsugaya to you, Substitute."

"You didn't look 'alright '. A grimace doesn't even qualify to be 'alright'." he snapped.

I turn my head to look down at the floor.

"But, I've been really wanting to ask you this, Toshiro, when I was looking for you, when you run away, I went into your room."

"Why did you enter my bedroom? You know that's private, right?" I said giving a pained face.

Ichigo's eyes widened in surprise, but then he smiled.

"You see? It is so much better when you show emotion, you should be like this mor-" but he stopped when he saw the anger radiating off my face, "Look I am sorry, Shiro." Ichigo apologized.

« ICHIGO POV »

"I accept your apology ," Toshiro said formally, face returning back to normal.

_He didn't gripe at me for calling him Shiro?_

"So, um, would you like to go somewhere with me? I think you would like it." I asked, trying to bite back my nervousness.

He gave a beautiful, humored smile, "Ichigo Kurosaki, you aren't asking me on a date, are you?"

"It doesn't have to be a date, I mean, it is not a date! Unless, you want it to be?" I stammered.

"Well, how would I know something is going to end horribly if I do not try it."

"So?" I asked nervously.

"So, it is a date." he stated as he took my hand.

_Maybe impossible can happen. But why accept? Whatever the reason, Kurosaki, do not mess this up. _And with that we stood up, he closed his eyes, like he was told, and I led him down the stairs and out of the house.

« TOSHIRO POV »

He had one rough, but warm hand shielding my eyes. He also carefully led me over every bump or dip, although the path seemed flat. And the road stayed flat for some while, but then it gave way to grassy and hilly areas. He let me carefully for the longest time, then we stopped.

"Stay here, and no looking. I need to get something really quick," he said taking him and his warmth in some direction.

I listened and when I could not hear him any more, I slowly peaked my eyes out. Flashes of white and blue immediately came into my view. The Moon rippled on the waters edge as the water flowed down the mountainside. Flowers, open and closed alike, filled the delicate grass surrounding the pond vibrant hues. Water flowed beautifully into the pond, almost noiselessly. I gawked at the scene, drinking it all in. The trees almost looked like they were planed to stand exactly where they were, but looking back there was no road leading here, just serene trees, flowing grass, and brilliant flowers of all types. I walked over to the water's edge and peered in, mesmerized by the sight I saw in it. My reflection stared back at me, with a background of glowing stars. This sky looked like something from a movie tonight, perfect in design. I felt Ichigo's finger close my mouth, which was ajar with amazement. "This is, everything here is," I scrambled to find the right words to say, looking at his warm face.

"You had to look, I thought I told you to wait," he commented.

" It's gorgeous!" I blurted, "It is so perfect!"

" I knew you would like it," he said as we sat in the grass.

We stare at the stars, portrayed on a beautiful navy blue background.

" You know," Ichigo started, " I do believe I told you not to look and stay there."

I mustered up the straightest face I could for it was exceedingly easy for me to do, and stated, "You never said Simon says."

The orange haired teen busted out laughing, " How do you know about Simon says?"

" It is a popular children's game," I said quietly, "And sometimes it works on Matsumoto, especially after she has had a drink."

"Really?" Ichigo chuckled.

Then everything became silent again, crickets chirped in the bushes, and stars twinkle up above. We laid down in the grass, side-by-side. _This is the best date I've ever been on_. I thought, turning my head to the side to look at the other's face. _But then again, I've only dated one other guy. _ He turned his head and looked into my eyes. He then gingerly sat up, and inched closer. Laying back down again he tentatively placed his hand in my hair and stared longingly into my eyes. Our gazes were caught, but after while staring, he brought me onto his chest and wrapped his arms around me. His hold was relaxed, but strong. _I couldn't leave even if I wanted to._

« ICHIGO POV »

He was cold. But when was he not? His bangs hung beautifully in his aquamarine eyes. I held him there, not wanting to let go, but my grip was loose enough to look into his eyes. _Buck up! _ Something inside me yelled, _Just go for it!_ I swallowed thickly and went for it. I leaned forward and captured his lips in mine. My eyes closed while his widened, although his soon closed as well. I deepen the kiss, wanting more. We kissed passionately, and surprisingly, he was a good kisser. I easily dominated the kiss, though. I explored the wet crevices of his mouth. He then push me away, gasping for air.

"I c-couldn't breathe!" he complained.

" I am so sorry, I didn't mean to, I am so-"

"Okay, Okay!" He said in annoyance, "Can we just get back to the 'date' ?"

I smiled, "Yeah."

«UNKNOWN'S POV »

I grimaced, staring at the two.

"How dare Ichigo mess with him," I said watching the two set up a picnic setting, "Doesn't he know that he is mine?"

**That is the end of chapter 3, I hope you all enjoyed and I'm sorry for the wait, but it may take just as long next time. But please, feedback would be really appreciated! But that is all; see you all later! Also I understand that there are errors, but this was originally typed on a kindle, and not all of the buttons are present in this keyboard. Plus, I do not have a beta...**

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